TV Quiz

Mrs. Linklater watches her share of television. Chances are she watches your share, too. In fact, there is never time when she can't find something to rivet her interest. Only recently she was fascinated to discover that Mr. Kotter plays poker in the middle of the night these days.

So, just for fun, let's play a guessing game about some of the dialog Mrs. L enjoyed during tonight's offerings.

Can you name the actors who spoke these lines tonight on my TV?

A man's reach must exceed his grasp or what's a penis for?
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A. I remember how sensitive I was about my first boy-girl party.
B. That was in college right?
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A. That is the battle cry of the chronic masterbater.
B. Define chronic.
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A. I'm sorry I yelled at you.
B. I'm sorry I farted into your purse.
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A. You just have to let nature take its course.
B. Except that nature keeps telling him to scratch his ass.
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A. You know how I found out about French kissing?
B. Mom sliced a plum and stuck her tongue in it.
A. You could have kept that secret to your grave.
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A. Name something that's better after it's been broken in.
B. A husband.
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There are no prizes for correct answers. Just a warm, tingly feeling that could easily be leaking from a hole in your coffee cup.

See what you're missing? While you're out there raising children, going to concerts, having parties, and making the world a better place, Mrs. Linklater stays focused on her self-appointed task, her finger planted firmly on the remote. It's a tough job, but somebody's got to, you know, blah blah blah.