One Step Closer to Assisted Living

It looks like my brain matter may be reaching critical lows here. For so long, I've been thinking how well I've been holding my own against the arrival of large scoops of oatmeal where my thinking processes used to be. But after today I'm not so sure. 
          This sad tale begins on Friday. All day Friday I thought it was Saturday. Ha ha, laugh your butt off, but it could happen to you. Ever lost a Tuesday or a Wednesday after one of those Monday holidays? I rest my case.
          Part of thinking that Friday was Saturday was because I had an off site meeting at someone's house. I bet you wouldn't know what day it was either, if you were having a work meeting in a suburban kitchen, while snacking on artichoke dip, instead of sitting in a conference room with your computer and a Starbuck's. So all day Friday, I was in Saturday mode. Saturday Saturday Saturday. Today is Saturday. Except when someone reminded me it was Friday.
          Like jet lag, this problem doesn't usually last very long. But, this time, it lasted all day Saturday, too. Because all day Saturday I kept thinking it was Sunday. And the playoff games just confirmed that it was Sunday. Because the NFL plays on Sundays, right? 
          Now here comes the truly sad part. This morning I woke up thinking it was Monday. For the third day in a row I was 24 hours on the wrong side of dawn. I lay in bed as long as I could, hating Monday, until I just made myself get up and get ready for work. But first I checked my email and there were a bunch already. A client wanted me to call at 2:00, so I said I'd call them at 2:00. Then I was on the road thinking a lot of people must have Martin Luther King day off because the traffic was nice and light going into the city. NPR had an interesting interview on with the guy who's head of the Innocence Project in Chicago -- the folks who have exonerated a very high rate of prisoners on death row. But I wondered if it was just a re-run since they kept calling it their weekend edition. 
          Before reaching the office I planned to stop at The Goddess, my favorite place for breakfast croissants, fresh juice, and pasta salads. I like to load up there on food for the day. But they were closed. Apparently they were celebrating MLK day too. 
         So I went to the 7-11 near the office, and actually got a good parking place. Usually I was competing with a bunch of delivery folks and other worker bees getting their morning coffee and donuts. But today was great -- front row seat and plenty of donuts to choose from. Everybody's enjoying the holiday. 
         The lady ahead of me in line was chattering on about something I half listened to. After she got her change she waved and said, "Go Bears!" And I snapped to, but not the way you might think. Instead of realizing it was Sunday, I thought, WOW -- the Bears' playoff game is on a Monday Night. 
         Purchases in hand, I drove the last couple of blocks only to discover that the gate to the parking lot was closed. What? The office is formally closed for MLK Day? Nobody's coming in? Did I miss a memo--shit.
         Finally. I. realized. it. wasn't. Monday.  
         And those emails? They were from Friday afternoon, when I was out of pocket doing something away from my computer. So busy, in fact, that I didn't check email until Sunday. Or Monday, depending on whose brain you're checking into. So I had some 'splaining to do to my client, once I completed my misguided jaunt into the city and back.  There's fifty miles of gas I'll never see again.
         Crapadoodle-do.