Patrick's Saturday Six on Monday

LINK TO PATRICK'S PLACE if you want to play.

Mother's Day is when all calorie caution is thrown to the wind.  So I ordered Eggs Benedict at brunch, just in case I hadn't reached my yearly dose of cholesterol yet. I managed to consume not one, but two of those English muffin thingys piled high with extras and slathered in Hollandaise. I couldn't eat anything else all day. Okay, except for a couple of pieces of candy I found in the pocket of my jacket. Yes! I needed a jacket. It's MAY here in the Chicago area. 40 degrees and damp.

1. When is the last time you switched from one company to another for an important service? What made you switch? Did the company you were leaving try to make you a better offer to make you stay?

I have three phone lines -- all different carriers -- because I don't trust any of them.  So I keep getting deals every time I threaten to switch from one to another when I don't like the service I'm getting.  Soon I hope to get all free.

2. What emblem or logo was on the last coffee mug you drank from?

I drink tea, not coffee. Usually it's Snapple Peach tea out of the bottle, even in the winter.  HOWEVER, I do use mugs for a nice cuppa soup or hot chocolate with the little marshmallows.  The cup I use most has rabbits funking all over it.  But you have to look hard to notice that's what they're doing. I'm all class.

3. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being a world-class chef and 1 being someone who can't even scramble an egg, how would you rate your cooking ability?

I WAS a good meat and potatoes cook -- especially mashed with gravy, or anything grilled -- from turkey to roasts, to fish and veggies. I also loved to baking cookies, pies and cakes and made great butter frosting from scratch. I even went through a homemade bread phase. But don't ask for something with a foreign name, except Hollandaise sauce. Now, if it doesn't heat up in the microwave, I don't buy it. So I'm probably in negative numbers these days.

4.  Take the quiz: Are you a good cook?

Apparently I'm a creative cook. Haaaaaa. Which means I can look in my cupboard and come up with something edible on a moment's notice. As long as you like canned kidney beans with garlic ramen noodles.

5. When was the last time you prepared a meal for someone other than yourself or those already living with you? Was it well received?

I last cooked for more than myself TWO years ago. I managed not to kill twenty something people at the Jersey Shore. They feasted on my signature 1950's retro style tuna tettrazini made with real cream, smoked Gouda and parmesan. The women hate it -- too fattening.The guys love it, based on the shovel they use to load it on their plates. Guess who I cook for?

6. Since it is that time of year, what show's season finale are you most looking forward to? Which show do you wish would just go away?

Law and Order -- all of them -- still my favorite shows. Nova and Frontline are second. But it's hard to tell when PBS has a season finale. On the other hand, I get physically sick just looking at the bugs and slimy stuff they want people to eat on Fear Factor, just surfing passed the channel it's on. EEEWWW. For some reason, I can't watch DEAL OR NO DEAL either.