Monday, December 8, 2008

Weather Girl

You know it's been too cold when it has to warm up to snow. Freezing your ass is a weather pattern here. Thirty-five degrees feels like a heat wave. The other day, I actually said, "Hey, it warmed up." It was 31. I wish I were kidding. The thermostat may read 70. But my toilet seat feels like a block of ice.

You people south of St. Louis don't have a clue.

I'm sleeping with two down comforters, high top wool socks, polar fleece pants and a sweatshirt with a hood. Yep, I got my sexy back.

I purchased one of those little ceramic heaters for my legs while I'm at the computer. They come plastered with warnings that read: "high temperature, keep electrical cords, diapers, and other furnishings at least 3 feet from the front of the heater and away from the side and rear." Turns out I can't be more than one foot away from the heater or all I get is a wind chill factor. Does this mean my Depends are going to burst into flames?

5 comments:

Remo said...

That heater is useless. "Keep away from...rear"? How do they expect you to toast your muffins?

It's scheduled to be a frigid 75 here today. I better get more sunblock.

Is polar fleece the new paisley?

Rose said...

hee hee I feel your pain! I love it when the school bus is full, all the body heat and talking creates a warm breeze.

But wait it's only December we have the lovely month of January to deal with...-60 wind chills anyone?

Rose in Oswego

cw2smom said...

Yikes! I don't think I will ever complain again! Can you even move to roll over in bed with all THAT on ya? LOL! Stay near that heater! Lisa

Chris said...

Only if you have been drinking high proof liquor before using said depends;)

Des's big daddy said...

I thought Depends were made out of asbestos...