Saturday, June 19, 2004

Recycling Police

Answer: At least 200 hours of community service and three years' probation. Question:  What's the penalty for not recycling?  

Just so there's no confusion -- this entry isn't about taking old police officers and finding a new use for them after they're worn out.

This is about the feeling Mrs.Linklater got today when she deliberately threw an empty Snapple container into the wet garbage -- instead of rinsing the bottle out and dropping it into the glass section of the recycling bin -- like a good little soldier. Not to mention that she left the metal cap on, too. 

The feeling Mrs. Linklater got was fear.

What if somebody heard the glass clinking against the garbage can when she threw out the garbage?

What if the garbage bag fell out of the garbage can when the garbage truck hoisted it up to dump the contents?  

What if the bag broke when it fell?  

What if the unrecycled Snapple bottle fell out onto the ground. With its cap still on.  So everybody could see it? 

What if it became apparent that Mrs. Linklater chose NOT to recycle. 

This one time. Okay, a second time.

Would the recycling police pay a visit to her door?  Would a jury convict her?

Not wanting to find out, Mrs. Linklater just went through the garbage about ten minutes ago and retrieved the Snapple bottle along with its cap. She quickly washed them off and put them into their separate sections of the recycling bin.

Phew.  That was close. 





1 comment:

quroboros said...

Oh boy, this entry reminded me of the psychological reprogramming I had to go thru after the City of Dallas STOPPED their recycling pick-up.  I was a avid, fervent recycler.. absolutely foaming at the mouth if I saw anyone toss out a tuna can or not flatten out a cereal box.  Then suddenly, the city decides the program is "not worthwhile" & cuts all funding.  After almost a year's worth of glass jars & chipboard collected in my garage, I had to admit defeat and go back to trashing the environment.  I give up on this back-asswards town, so be thankful you live in a city that still cares.  ¤Holly