Wednesday, January 4, 2006

Is 49 the new 31?


AOL, along with an army of publicists and plastic surgeons, is trying to tell us these women are prime examples of the new middle age.

If that's the case, then feast your eyes on the Botox Generation. The best looking forty and fifty something females that money can buy.

Oprah's looks are a miracle of modern make up, hefty hair styling, a personal trainer and a private chef. 

Demi has been augmented and cemented more than a new patio.

When was the last time you saw Madonna's face move?

The Nicollette Sheridan pictured here bears no resemblance to the Nicollette Sheridan of twenty years ago. No wonder she's starting to look like she's impersonating herself.

Sharon Stone sued someone who claimed she'd had work done. Earth to Sharon -- you've had work done. 

And Christy Brinkley?  If they pull your cheeks any higher you won't be able to see.

All but a couple of these women have spawned. They've expelled those large bowling balls called children from their bodies. A process not generally recommended in most beauty regimens.

As for ordinary women who think they, too, can recapture the flat abs of their youths after a litter of kids -- without surgical intervention, lipo, or a blind husband -- I've got some old Michael Bolton tapes for you.

Hey ladies, life's a bitch. Embrace it. At least, get real.


mutualaide said...

I've earned my wrinkles and sags and grey strands of hair.  I might work on them a smidge, but the truth is, each one represents an important moment or event in my life -- so yeah, I embrace them!

ally123130585918 said...

I have this dread that one day I will see a navel where the chin dimple used to

billierwilson said...

every wrinkle and gray hair are part of the road map to 'my life', haha. the gray hairs get covered occasionally, people don't need to see all the 'alternate routes', lol. that is the only 'fun' with my appearence that i would concent to for myself. i have a good friend that had her stomach by-passed, tummy tucked and implants for the skin that sagged to her waist, she's having the time of her life. but then so am i, without the expence, haha. life is what you make it.
love your entries!

judypearllove said...

I can't stand that frozen stretched look. I've seen some scary people in the casino with work done also. I love natural make up, nice nails and toes and dressing modern with modern hair cut. Laugh at life keep the attitude nice and wha la you are pretty at any age. Really doesn't cost an arm and a leg either.

ksquester said...

I love this entry. Let's see, do I want plastic surgery or jewelry?  I choose jewelry!  Nothing like diamonds to put a sparkle in ones eyes. haaaaaaaaa  There is something about embracing ones own "self" that is really quit fullfilling. Sags, bags, chin hairs, arthritic hands, age spots and belly bulges are signs of self acceptance and freedom. Jamie Lee Curtis was at a movie award show, sitting among lots of stars and her husband said, "Know who the most beautiful woman in the room is?" His answer was Jessica Tandy. I know my bloom has faded, but hopefully I will grow older with grace. Anne/Saturdays child

lacaza3 said...

I work for plastic surgeons and I can spot it a mile away..I mean fine if you want the plastic surgery nobody cares but quit saying its natural...The bitches need to share there weath with us less famous people and then maybe we wouldnt be so jealous...well maybe jealous isnt the right word who knows
donna In TEXAS

onmiownnow2 said...

No one thinks badly of you if you have an old house and you restore it... so why should anyone fault you for plastic surgery?  If your shutters are loose and falling off, your paint is chipping, and the porch is sagging, by all means FIX IT!  If I had the money I'd have a mini face lift and a boob lift.  I'd enjoy my new body a lot more than a new car!  ;)  Hugs!  Lisa

jevanslink said...

Nothing wrong with plastic surgery.  Just don't pretend you haven't had any.  Mrs. L

onemoretina said...

    I live in Los Angeles, and let me tell you, I have seen some really nasty misadventures in cosmetic surgery.  The worst?  Those awful looking plate-lips ... the result of one too many collagen injections.  I think that the saddest thing of all is when these people believe that no one can tell.  The fact is that a fifty year old face has telltale signs, other than what can be fixed with a scalpel and some shots of whatever substance they are using at the moment.  So, when I see some of these women ( men, too ... but there dont seem to be as many of them ... yet ) I'm not thinking about how young they look, but rather who had the best doctor.  I don't think that's the desired reaction.  Tina

bosoxblue6993w said...

does anybody remember what Joan Rivers originally looked like?

tillysweetchops said...

I wouldn't rule out a little nip/tuck when necessary; in theory that is. Unfortunately, with my imagination I don't think I'd be able to go through with it; I'd probably end up as a statistic, and we don't get as much money when we sue over here.

Happy New Year, Mrs L.


screaminremo303 said...

I don't know if 49 is the new 31, but I'm beginning to feel like 45 is the old 83.

I'm just glad they haven't perfected THE augmentation for men. There's enough of us acting like big dicks already. We don't generally need another excuse.

artloner said...

Why do they give everybody in Hollywood the exact same nose?  Changes the nares a little, but it's the same thing...I know that's a disgusting observation, but as an old ER gal, I look and think "Wonder how they could ever get an NT tube in there, if they had to??"


I sure do miss you, LinkyLu...



suzypwr said...

I didn't read the article, but I think women today of 49 have just about the energy our grandmas did at 31, if nothing else. Lifespans are much longer, medicine has come lightyears, and we just don't want to sit down and be old at 30 any more. We can't help it if we don't look like teenagers, but attitude counts!


sunnyside46 said...

I am so with you on this one
Here at 49, myself, laugh lined & feelin fine