Sunday, March 5, 2006

To Be At Home Or To Not Be At Home -- That Is The Question

Work vs. Stay at Home
Which side of the fence is right for you?
Here, a balanced look at both.

Mrs. Linklater smirks. Balanced?  Probably not. The number of women who have a choice between working and staying home is an upper middle class issue. Most women are working because they have to. So this is a pretty elite crowd. Married to traders, lawyers, dentists, guys who can sock it away. And sock it to their wives when they get tired of them. So this isn't a balanced look. It's a narrow one.

The benefits of working full-time
For you:
Although you cherish your child, you'll appreciate that not everything in life revolves around her. Working also keeps you in the game career-wise and stimulates you intellectually.

Mrs. Linklater has done both. She preferred being home with her children. Because when they're young your life should be about THEM. And going to the zoo beats marketing meetings any day.

The best reason to continue working fulltime has nothing to do with keeping your mind from turning to oatmeal.  It's all about socking money FOR YOURSELF into a 401K and Social Security, assuming Cheney doesn't spend it on hunting trips.

A lot of women may keep working because they define themselves by the careers they have. So they'll come up with any excuse not to give up their identity. Kids be damned.

Women who stay at home without a paycheck have NOTHING being put away for them, except in their hubby's account. Historically, husbands don't have a great track record sharing in the long run. Esepecially if there's a divorce.  If a woman stays home, her husband should be able to call the money he gives her a salary, from which contributions to a 401K and/or social security can be made. 

For your kids: Your child may learn to do things for herself earlier and faster than the kids of stay-at-home moms.

Oh, horsesh*t. The operative word here is MAY. The flip side of that is MAY NOT.  

For your marriage: Keeping the spark alive may be easier than if you stayed home, because part of you -- the savvy working woman -- still resembles the person your partner married.

Nothing like working 12 hours, including a plane trip to the home office, racing home, shopping for food on the way, supervising homework and falling into bed with your clothes on to keep the spark going.

Oh, you're talking about the two per cent of working moms who have nannies and housekeepers to do the heavy lifting, while savvy career babe is choosing a sexy nightie for bedtime. Not likely.

I guess the perks of staying home are coming on tomorrow's welcome screen.  I can hardly wait.


screaminremo303 said...

If it's right for the kids, then it's the right choice. Nothing else matters.

elleme2 said...

Right on as usual, Mrs. L.  I love your plan for the salaried stay-at-home mom.  Where do we sign the petition?

ladeeoftheworld said...

Anxiously awaiting the perks from AOL with you.  

suzypwr said...

You only covered one end of the spectrum. Don't forget the career mothers also called welfare mothers. They will look you in the face, when you are a single mother, exhausted from working all day and caring for children at night, and say to you, "I don't have to work. I have children," right after you drag them out of the neighbor's pool to discuss their work plan.


mombzbe said...

You're right Mrs L.  This argument is rarely balanced, and usually thrust upon us in an all-or-none fashion.

I fall into a gray area.  I work part-time, in my field, but am home the rest of the time.  We make it work so that one of us is always home for the kids.  It's a juggling act, to be sure, but it works for us.

And the most important thing of all, is it works for them. :)