I trying to find some. Gimme a minute.
Until yesterday when Don Imus claimed his daily four hour screed was a
comedy show, not a news program, I confess I had no idea he was funny.
Nice of him to clear that up. Now that I know, I can hardly wait to
laugh my ass off the next time that pencil necked wrinkled old white
man with a 70's haircut takes to the airwaves.
Not to put too fine a point on it, but isn't the first rule of comedy to MAKE ME LAUGH?
That's probably where I went wrong. I got distracted from the hilarity
of it all because I was listening to his nasal voice as it threaded its
way through that faucet he calls a nose. By the way, are your teeth
yellow, Don, or did someone piss in your mouth? Hmm, I may have stepped over the line on that one.
But, like I say, now that I know that he's funny, because he told me
so, it's going to be a heck of a lot easier to enjoy his unique brand
of laff riot humor. Nothing like insulting women and minorities to
get people rolling in the aisles.
Of course I have to wait a couple of weeks to listen to his show, since
he's recovering from the tap on the wrist that the courageous folks
who broadcast this relic from the fifties felt pressured to inflict. Apparently they believed him
when he said, "I'm not a bad person. I just said a bad thing."
Isn't that the Mel Gibson defense without all the alcohol?
He portrays himself as someone who insults everyone equally. Like he's the Don Rickles of radio -- if Rickles made
racist, sexist remarks that are never, ever funny.
I predict that Imus will be fired. Yep, his ass is grassola. But, not to worry, he'll get an offer from the Discovery Channel to
star in a documentary about dinosaurs. I can't wait to hear what it was like when the asteroid hit.