My sump pump isn't pumping. Needless to say, the timing of this unfortunate lack of pumpage isn't so good. We are having one of those long, slow, endless rains that lasts a couple of days. Usually I take this opportunity to add to my home's personal collection of ground water and send it over to my neighbor's yard.
This time Murphy's Law is in effect. Breakdowns only happen on Sundays, a sign of the Apocalypse, or in my case, double time plumbing charges for water related events. I think I'll be at the hardware store when it opens up this morning to get myself some sandbags. I wonder if they have any you can plug in.
What are my grandchildren going to play with now that all their toys have been recalled? Wait, I don't have any grandchildren. For once in my life I don't feel left out. I feel lucky. No little kids to poison with lead paint and swallowed magnets. Maybe for the rest of you, this is a chance for families to do more things together. Take walks, play catch, look up at the sky and count the stars, or sit around the campfire and roast marshmallows. Marshmallows aren't made in China, are they?
Speaking of China, I know nothing about Chinese numerology. I only know that knowledgeable people add up the letters in your name and say things like --"You're an eight. Eight is a donkey. Donkeys can't float."
I think Jim Carey's movie 23 was based on the way the Chinese count numbers or something. Everything in his life always added up to twenty-three. Twenty-three letters in his name, the Pope's name, JFK's name, Lincoln's name. That plus 23 squares of toilet paper will wipe your butt.
In my case, when it comes to numbers, it seems like a lot of phone numbers and zip codes belonging to my friends are the same, or close.
For instance, one of my frequent flyer numbers is 57248. The zip code of a good friend is 75248. Amazing, no? I also have three sets of friends who have matching phone numbers. Well, the last four at least. Two with 1947. Two with 6799. What's the third? Oh yes, an old boyfriend and my girlfriend's mother also have the same last four digits. Two people I know with different area codes in different states have the same prefix -- 784. I know, remarkable isn't it? Another friend lived at an 822 address, moved to another state, and now the last four digits of her work phone number are 8122. I can hear the shock and awe rippling through the internet.
My home phone was once 5732. My work phone was 4587. They both have 5 and 7 in them. Maybe I'm not doing this right.
Chicago Bears' Superbowl Punky QB Jim McMahon has a kid who is the starting quarterback on my town's high school football team this year. He's only a junior and he's getting lots of attention before he's even thrown a ball. The good news is that he's 6'1" 215 lbs., not 5"7, 160, so he might actually have a future.
What's more interesting is that he's playing for a school that has only 2500 kids in a league where most of their competition weighs in at around 4000 students. But they always win their share of state championships against the bigger schools. Most recently in basketball. Maybe a couple of other sports. There's a sign posted as you come into town, with everything from the winners of the High School Math Challenge to the National Cheerleading champs. Maybe I'll read it more closely the next time I'm waiting for the light to change.
I do know that in 1974 the baseball team won the state title in the spring and a lot of those same boys were on the football team that won the state championship that fall. Scott Sanderson who starred on the baseball team and went on to pitch for the Cubs was one of those guys. He didn't win Best Athlete though. That class was so loaded with jocks that he got beaten out by a fellow pitcher who played two other sports. Don't ask why I know this.
Now those guys are getting to an age when people begin to realize that high school was probably the pinnacle of their lives. You have to get a few yearsunder your belt to realize you peaked early. Those of us on the downhill side of that slippery slope just try to keep our butts away from sharp sticks and pebbles as we pick up speed on the way to the bottom.
The Thunderbirds are in town this weekend for the largest lakefront water show in the country, according to people who make this stuff up. They're the Air Force aces who fly an inch apart. Today they would be flying into buildings. It rained yesterday. It's raining today. Maybe we can watch re-runs.
Meanwhile I am beginning to have a taste for a powdered donut. Yesterday I was invited to a party at somebody's home overlooking the lake. I didn't jump for joy when I got the invite until someone said -- "There's going to be food, Mrs. Linklater."