Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Tased Any Cougars Lately?

Here, in no particular order is a bunch of the winning words of the year, as determined by the folks who bring you the Oxford English Dictionary and Webster's. Since first posting the list, Mrs. Linklater has added some helpful comments of her own to clarify each definition. You're welcome.

Ignore things that look like links. They don't work.

2007 - Oxford Winner

“Locavore” was coined two years ago by a group of four women in San Francisco who proposed that local residents should try to eat only food grown or produced within a 100-mile radius. Other regional movements have emerged since then, though some groups refer to themselves as “localvores” rather than “locavores.” However it’s spelled, it’s a word to watch.

[Not to worry, no one outside of Berkeley CA will ever use this stupid word correctly in a sentence]


Runners-up for the Oxford 2007 Word [or phrase] of the Year include:

aging in place: the process of growing older while living in one’s own residence, instead of having to move to a new home or community.

[Not to be confused with the process of aging in front of the television because you can't get out of your chair]


bacn: email notifications, such as news alerts and social networking updates, that are considered more desirable than unwanted “spam” (coined at PodCamp Pittsburgh in Aug. 2007 and popularized in the blogging community)

[Egg McNuthins are forwarded jokes from people who never send you anything else]

cloudware: online applications, such as webmail, powered by massive data storage facilities, also called “cloud servers.”

[Cloudgate on the other hand is the polished chrome dome scultpture that all Chicagoans call "The Bean"]


colony collapse disorder: a still-unexplained phenomenon resulting in the widespread disappearance of honeybees from beehives, first observed in late 2006

[Also refers to the unexplained phenomenon in the Malibu Colony where the widespread use of Viagra causes the disappearance of -- nevermind]

cougar: an older woman who romantically pursues younger men

["Romantically?" What's love got to do with it?]


MRAP vehicle: Mine Resistant Ambush Protected vehicle, designed to protect troops from improvised explosive devices (IEDs)

[A step up from the Mostly Retarded Army Protected Humvees]

mumblecore an independent film movement featuring low-budget production, non-professional actors, and largely improvised dialogue 

[I always thought this was porn]

previvor: a person who has not been diagnosed with a form of cancer but has survived a genetic predisposition for cancer

[So you can still get the big "C", but w00t!! you survived the first bullet in the chamber]

social graph: the network of one’s friends and connections on social websites such as Facebook and Myspace

[Paragraphs, capitalization, complete sentences, and grammar are not included]

tase (or taze): to stun with a Taser (popularized by a Sep. 2007 incident in which a University of Florida student was filmed being stunned by a Taser at a public forum)

[Mase (or Maze) is when you get mugged with a taser]

upcycling: the transformation of waste materials into something more useful or valuable

[Downcycling is what happens when you try to make a garden statue out of horse manure and end up throwing it away]

WEBSTER'S 2007 TOP TEN LIST

WINNER:
w00t (interjection)
expressing joy (it could be after a triumph, or for no reason at all); similar in use to the word "yay"
-- w00t! I won the contest!

[W3ll, I r3ally think c0mbining l3tt3rs and numb3rs is a pr3tty st00pid id3a]

     1.     facebook
     2.    
conundrum
     3.    
quixotic
     4.    
blamestorm
     5.    
srdoodledom
     6.    
apathetic
     7.    
Pecksniffian
     8.    
hypocrite
     9.    
charlatan

There's a word missing from these lists. It's the one word I think should have been included in somebody's top ten at some point. Here it is:


GOVERNATOR

n. Robotic politician with an Austrian accent


4 comments:

screaminremo303 said...

They left out Remodamus. I'm pissed.

Wait until they see my predictions.

gaboatman said...

Mrs. L
I agree, Governator should have made the lists.  
Sam

swibirun said...

Loved your commentary, hilarious as always!

mombzbe said...

Governator is perfect.  Ha!
Anna