Sunday, December 6, 2009

Waking Up and Smelling The Coffee

Let's say you've been in a coma for the last ten years, ever since Tiger won his first Masters' with a record score. Being a good friend, I offer to get you up to speed with all the celebrity/pro athlete gossip you missed, while you were sleeping.

So we play a game. I give you a hint and you try to guess who I'm talking about. You rip right through all the easy ones. The well-known baseball players who were juiced. The big-time actors who broke up with their wives. You're on a roll.

And then I throw you a curve. What pro athlete or celebrity got caught cheating on his wife? Oh, wait, sorry, that number is so large we'll be here for weeks. Let me narrow it down for you. What squeaky clean athlete or celebrity got married five years ago to a beautiful model, had two kids, and was cheating on her with not one, not two, but three women at least?

Besides most of pro sports, you ask? Right. That's still a huge group. So I try to get more specific -- He's African-American, his wife is Scandinavian, he plays golf. That should get it down to a manageable number.

And you say, "You're kidding. Is Sammy Davis still alive?"

So I just come out and tell you -- it's Tiger Woods.

And you look at me, shake your head, and say, "Tiger, huh? So?"

That seems to be the reaction from everyone since fire hydrant-gate. No outrage. No exasperation. Maybe a little disappointment. But, entitlement is one of the perks it seems.

His sponsors are backing him all the way. His wife is sticking around so far. Even one of his ladies is denying that anything went down, as it were. Clearly there will be no consequences, financial, legal, or otherwise, for Tiger Woods.

Maybe the Obama state dinner party crashers will get life with no parole. I can hope, can't I?


Donna said...

Well, what are you going to do? Put every man and woman that strays on the spouse in prison?

Remo said...

The word from my pro golfer contacts is that no one - NO ONE - liked the guy. Not because he was good but because they considered him a complete asswipe.