Tuesday, March 2, 2010

How To Date A Single Parent

Surely you noticed the dating advice and tips on the AOL, sorry, Aol Personals page today. The one about the eight tips for dating a single parent. You missed it? Well here's a quick summary:
1. Be understanding. [Yeah, suck up to the little bastards.]
2. Make an effort. [You know, get off the couch once in a while.]
3. Get lost occasionally. [Let someone else hog the remote.] 
4. Spend time with the kids. [Bring money. Go to the mall.] 
5. Don't get too parental. [Timeouts are for umpires.]
6. Avoid good cop/bad cop. [Russian Roulette is so Deerhunter.] 
7. Be mature. [But don't get fuddy duddy on everybody.] 
8. Get comfortable with the ex. [Just not too comfortable.] 
     Naturally Mrs. Linklater has more rules she'd like to add to this list. She feels entitled since she raised her daughters from when they were in single digits. And they made it out the other side. 
1. If I got a babysitter, we're going out. 
2. If the kids are with their dad, we're going out.
3. If the kids are at camp, we're going out. 
4. If one of the kids comes knocking in the middle of the night, don't be surprised to find yourself under the bed, in the closet, or behind a door.
5. You are not their uncle.
6. You are not their life coach.
7. Sunday breakfast is your responsibility.
8. So's your laundry. 
Thus endeth the lesson for today.


Tiny Elvis said...

I always find it strange when random guys who aren't techincally in the family encourage kids to call them "uncle," since they don't have an official title. It's especially strange if you're dating that kid's mom. According to Tyra, kids are popping out of the womb a lot hipper to the fact that Uncle Whoever shouldn't be poking mom.

datingtipss said...

As a single dating is even more difficult compared to people without children. Your kids always are your number 1 priority. For men without children it’s hard to understand that they come second and have to share your time. On Line Singles

Mrs. L said...

Oh Mr. Datingtipss, are you a computer? Your first sentence makes NO SENSE. "As a single dating is even more difficult compared to people without children."

Your website is even scarier.

As to your second point, "For men without children it's hard to understand that they come second and have to share your time," -- that's not the real problem. The real problem is that too many single mothers put their kids second. They forget their children need them as soon as some guy starts dangling things in front of them. Shiny or otherwise.

Tressa Bailey said...

I only have a few standards: 1) My house my rules. 2)My kids rule. 3) what makes you think that if you can't handle my kids that you could ever possibly handle me...I'm the one that made them that way.

Those usually get rid of the guys pretty quick....LOL.