Monday, May 16, 2005

Boxers or Briefs

Does Darth Vader wear boxes or briefs?  That was the $1.39 question on my Welcome Screen tonight. I am paying for this shit?

After a day where my toughest decision was whether to have the tuna pita or the cobb salad for lunch, contemplating Darth Vader's lingerie was almost refreshing. In a disturbed, you need to get a life kind of way.

But a slippery slope I slid down like the last train out of town.

Stormtroopers, oil can or WD-40?  Han Solo, Altoids or gum? Luke Skywalker, gay or straight? R2D2, plastic or paper? Yoda, Puma or Adidas? Jabba the Hut, Diet or regular?

Barbara Walters, t-shirts or nighties? Diane Sawyer, Listerine or Scope?  Jay Leno, garlic or onions?

Bill O'Reilly, two ply or recycled?  Hillary Clinton, Nascar or Formula One?  Ted Koppel, mousse or conditioner? Jessica Simpson, real or fake?  Sam Donaldson, real or fake?

Oprah, delivery or DiGiorno's?  Ty Pennington, Rob or Amber?  

Okay, I've had my fun. Now it's your turn.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

C3-PO, cd player or boom box? or maybe 8 track or cassette? YEAH you found your humor. love this one, thank you.
Billie

Anonymous said...

WD-40, gum, ambiguously gay, paper, Adidas, diet, nighties, Scope, garlic. No question. But you got me at Bill O'Reilly wiping his ass with recycled paper.  Too tough to actually find a ply. Gritty, but not as gritty as coarse-grained sandpaper. I fear I can't go on.

You're right. These disturbing last trains out of town ARE refreshing. Take me to the end of the line. Better yet, just put me on that little track-switching doohickey and spin me in a circle till I puke up Altoids laced with garlic.

Anonymous said...

Mrs.L found her humor! Life is good.

Anonymous said...

WINK MARTINDALE ... TP folder or TP crumpler?
JOAN RIVERS ... plastic surgery or arc welding?

Anonymous said...

John Kerry: Botox or Preparation H?
John McCain: Paxil or Prozac?
George W. Bush: Comics or Horoscopes?
Michael Jackson: Darwin or Jehovah?

This is too easy.

Anonymous said...

"Ty Pennington, Rob or Amber?" Priceless... althought this lesbian LOVES Ty, in all his goofy splendor. :):) You still got it Mrs. L!!!!! judi

Anonymous said...

Just spent five minutes trying to google who the hell ty pennington is !
Damn and blast my scottish inadequacy in all things american cable !
I gotta get me a satellite dish ....hate not getting the references lol
As for the rest....
Darth = neither cod piece explains the breathing
Skywalker = jeees he fancied his sister thats gotta mess with a guys head
Yoda - nike air max did you see the air that little guy caught in attack of the clones ?
Barbara Walter = polar fleece i believe (yay someone i knew )
And id like to add .....
Natalie portman = Pledge or chamios leather (that is one short hair do )
George lucas = the seyshelles or canary islands (which one to buy when the merchandising royalties come flooding in )
My cholesterol levels = burger king or mcdonalds
Mrs linklaters freshly returned sense of humour = national holiday declared or street party ?
x