Patrick's Saturday Six is located at his Weekender place.
I'll do a link eventually.
1. You are given a "remote control" that involves life itself. Of these
functions, which would you think you'd make the most use of:
fast-forward, rewind, or pause?
Rewind. Forty years. Duh.
2. If you could use a "change channel" button to become a totally different person, would you do so?
YES. Walking in someone else's
shoes would be intriguing. Assuming my options did not include the
Elephant Man, the Bearded Lady, any transgender types, or Monica
3. Do you own a gun? If not, what would it take for you to purchase one?
I do not own a gun. I will never own a gun. I'm scary enough without a gun. With a gun, I could kill someone.
On the other hand, I've mentioned
before that I seem to have a knack for hitting bullseyes with those air
rifles used at kids' camps. I'm also near perfect at the shooting
galleries at Great America. Perhaps I was a sniper in a former life.
I was once engaged to a medical
student whose family restored antique weapons. One day he wanted me to
shoot a pistol at some cans. So I could get used to firing guns. People
who own guns always want people who don't like guns to do stuff like
that. No thank you. He married someone else. Even though he was a
doctor, he continued his family's lucrative hobby of restoring antique
weaponry. A few years ago his wife was found accidentally shot through
the heart out on their shooting range.
That could have been me.
Another time I went with a guy I
know into a gun shop not too far from where I live. I was amazed that
there was a place with so much firepower in the middle of my suburban
existence. I have never felt a greater sense of malevolence in my
entire life. Gun anime is evil. I'll let law enforcement and the
military deal with it.
Okay, I could get a taser maybe. But only for frying bugs -- thanks for the idea, Remo.
4. Take the quiz: What piercing are you?
I'm not a piercing person. Anytime
I see someone with a pieced nose, eyebrow, lip, tongue, navel, penis,
labia, anything but their ears -- although seventeen ear piercings is a
bit much -- I just assume they are in too much psychic pain to function
on all cylinders. So I treat them with the deference I reserve for
small children and serial killers.
Even mainstream and very socially
acceptable ear piercings don't interest me, although I have thought
about them from time to time, for the convenience of it. Especially
since it isn't just gypsies who do that sort of thing anymore.
So, as you might expect, I took the
test only to discover that I'm so "boring" according to the testers
that I would only rate an ear piercing. Haaaaaa. I already knew
5. Would you ever get a piercing described in your answer to the previous question?
Ears? It could happen. I might be on shore leave some time, get drunk and end up at Claire's with my buddies.
6. Do you tend to visit friends and relatives at their homes more or have them visit you in your home more?
Since my friends and a number of
relatives live in swank places like Hawaii, Malibu, Montana, San Diego,
Georgetown, London, Paris, Door County, San Antonio, and Ireland, to
name a few destinations, and own houses that are substantially bigger
than mine, chances of them having me come to visit are greater than the
other way around. And that's just one reason to let them
entertain me. However, the Fourth of July is always a great time of the
year to come to Chicago.