Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Bag Lady With A Baby

Adriana Iliescu (credit Realitatea TV) Adriana Iliescu
Romanian hospital officials say a 66-year-old woman in Bucharest has given birth to a baby girl.  
Medical ethicists and retirement home residents are outraged. The hippocratic oath has been compromised; there should be a limit to how old a woman can be to have a child; and, frankly, this is just gross.  
Probably the first thing on everybody's mind when Grandma announced "I'm P.G.!" was 1) Who could possibly be the father, then 2) How in the world did he impregnate her -- with a bag over his head?  Come on, people, that's what you were thinking.   
The woman is 66, not 26. Even worse, she looks closer to 76.  Okay, no one looks their best right after having a baby, but this unfortunate photo gives new meaning to the phrase, Kiss of Death.   
Do you think she's nursing?  
This birth will no doubt create a whole spate of new book titles:
*Coping with Menopause During Pregnancy
*Wrinkles or Stretch Marks -- You Be the Judge   
Adriana Iliescu, who underwent fertility treatment for nine years before becoming pregnant, is thought to be the oldest recorded mother.  
Definitely the most tired.  
Remember -- this birth happened in Romania, a country notorious for orphanages filled with discarded babies, thanks to their government's ban on abortion.  One wonders whether Ms. Iliescu, her doctors, the government or the hospital have any appreciation for the irony.
The girl was born prematurely by Caesarean section after her twin sister died in the womb, the hospital said.
Actually the baby died of fright when it realized who its mother would be. 
Ms Iliescu told local television she had always wanted to be a mother but had been unable to conceive naturally.
Or as Janet Reno put it so well, "I'm just a homely spinster." 
A spokeswoman at the Giulesti Maternity Hospital in Bucharest said the surviving infant, named Eliza Maria, weighed just 1.4kg (3lb) and was still in intensive care, but breathing normally.
So after all that do-dah, Ms. Iliescu couldn't carry little Eliza Maria full term. Now the baby will be at high risk for all the unpleasant developmental problems that happen to premies. And when Eliza's mother dies of ovarian cancer next year from the previous nine years of fertility treatments, she can be put into one of those orphanages with all the other babies who need someone to care for them. The circle of life.  In Romania.
"The mother is doing well. She is saying she has been given a new lease on life," the spokeswoman said, according to the Associated Press news agency.
I think senior citizens across the world will jump at the chance to have a new lease on life that needs to be fed, burped and changed every two hours.  
Ms Iliescu, a retired university professor and author of children's books, was interviewed by Realitatea TV last month.
Which just proves you don't have to be stupid to be stupid.
She told the station she was optimistic about her future as a mother, claiming her family had a history of longevity.
But none of them had a toddler to chase after.
The BBC's Central Europe reporter, Nick Thorpe, says the doctor who artificially inseminated Mrs Iliescu with the sperm of an anonymous donator justified the procedure by saying Ms Iliescu was in an appropriate condition to give birth.
Dr. Frankenstein went on to say that Ms. Iliescu suffered no ill effects from all the electrical current.
[Her doctor] also said he had been impressed by her faith in God.
Artificial insemination is next to godliness.



mosie1944 said...

I'm sixty, and the very thought of raising a child at this stage of life horrifies me!  Just trying to be nice to my grandchildren when they visit for the weekend is difficult; they're not bad kids, but I'm used to having lots of peace, quiet, and space.

robbush6 said...

The Circle of Life in Romania plays like a bad rerun of Flatliners. Nadia Komenici was cute for 5 minutes at age 12. Then look what happened.

Think of the disclaimers that sperm donor had to sign!

somenuttychic said...

Loved your commentary -- well thought out, as always. Be careful what you ask for Mrs. L. Looking the way you do at 61, you will likely get your wish!  

quartrlyfecrysis said...

You had me falling out of my chair!!
Too funny Mrs. L :)

ahhliving said...

Joan Lunden must be giddy with the possibilities...

salemslot9 said...

61?...no way!

salemslot9 said...

you look much younger!

jevanslink said...

Thanks. Wish I FELT younger.  Mrs. L

salemslot9 said...

sure you do!...emailed your picture to my friend Bulldog...remember?... as in "Hey"...Beatles...he said he agrees with me.

pollysci said...

I was pretty much grossed out by the story.  

Lookin' hot, Mrs. L--luv the winter pic!

~tara, who thinks Ms. I should've been given electo-shock therapy rather than gov't-issue sperm.

swmpgrly said...

That woman looks more like 85 to me.she doesnt look like a ball of fire either. Mrs. L you can pass for 45,you look fantastic.
Love your new pic.

jocko8189 said...

Mrs. Linklater, what a fabulous picture! It has been downloaded, framed, and has become a source of daily inspiration for me!! Blizzards must agree with you! Thanks,much!

ann7inflorida said...

Yup....that is really gross.
Mrs. L, you sure are a hottie!!! You don't look a day over 41.
love your new about me pic. ~Ann : D

screaminremo303 said...

I wasn't aware Teresa Heinz-Kerry moved to Romania.

cneinhorn said...

Mrs L....and here I thought you were in your 30's.... :-)


yakvette said...

A couple of things:   1)  Remo is still insanely funny.   2) Quit stealing my stories and making them much funnier, dammit!  

Is it me or is anyone else turned on by the 24 inches of HOT Romanian forehead? Don't get me started on the sexy hair, either.  *rrrrowwwwwwwwwl*  

Mrs. L - you are one minxy chick.  Don't go changin....to try and please me.


robbush6 said...

Please, God. I hope jocko is talking about your picture and not the bag lady with a baby.

Some people just look good in hats. And bags.

judithheartsong said...

Oh, this was just brilliant. I MISSED you!!! judi

annkiesler said...

I needed that Mrs L.  In fact, just to cheer up my colleagues at the bin, I'm going to print it off for the notice board.  


jocko8189 said...

In response to Robbush and the rubbish comment! OF COURSE, I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE BEAUTIFUL MRS. LINKLATER!

jevanslink said...

Somehow I knew that.  Mrs. L

amy122389 said...

You are SO not 61!  Get out!  I might go with 40ish...but 61?!  You're lookin' foxy, Mrs. L!  (and I say that in a definitely non-lesbian sort of way.. :-P)

robbush6 said...

PUH-lease! Mrs. L. posts a picture of the ugliest woman to give birth in say, the last half century, and you go getting idignant. Everybody, but you, knows I was only making a joke. Perhaps you need to loosen that strap a bit.

yakvette said...

<throws food tray>


musenla said...

The decision is morally questionable to say the least.  I'm assuming she has the means to raise this child and have made arrangements for the child's care in case of her demise, but the issue of raising a child at such a late age and leaving it without a parent before it reaches maturity should be the overriding concern.  And why insist on getting pregnant when adoption is a more viable option?