Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Roseanne Barr To Replace Rosie?

There was a time when I was concerned with larger issues such as the future of the Soviet Union or whether weightlessness contributed to muscle loss, but not so much any more.

Take today for instance. Getting dressed would have been my crowning achievement. But I heard something on TV that got my hackles up. So I find myself in that rare position of having to speak out.

Regardless of the consequences, I find it necessary to put my foot down because I heard this morning on one of the early shows that Roseanne was being considered as Rosie's replacement on The View, Gag me.

I'm sure to most of you -- especially the guys -- those two women seem like the same person. They're both female; they're both considered fat by any standard; they're both over forty, they're both obnoxious; they both have similar names, and, supposedly, they're both comedians.

However, Roseanne's idea of funny is to sing the National Anthem off key on purpose. Not funny. And she posed semi-naked covered in mud with her husband of the moment, Tom Arnold, for Vanity Fair. That picture was just EEEEEWWWWWWWW. 

As if all that weren't enough, the truth is I can't stand her voice. It drives me insane, stuck up in her nose like that. It whines through her nasal passages and comes out sounding like she's not speaking, she's blowing her nose. 

Rosie sounds positively mellifluous by comparison.

Not that America's highest profile lesbian hasn't stepped over the line with her My Way Or The Highway attitude toward other people's opinions. I actually agree with a lot of her liberal crap [being full of it myself], except for her cockamammy theories about building seven being blown up with explosives on 911. Oh, please.

But she could be a little less STRIDENT. There, I said it, the one word besides bitch that nobody ever calls a man.

Couldn't they find someone who's just as controversial, but not necessarily a cartoon version of a female? 

Like say, Ann Coulter.

9 comments:

hewasolddog299 said...

Ah yes, the Ann Coulter ploy. Problem with that is it's a tranny neo-con with a lisp. Hardly a female, that.

Couldn't they bring in someone attractive and erudite? Or, perhaps, Baba Wawa could stick around on a daily basis...

mosie1944 said...

I have yet to discover one redeeming feature in Rosanne.  But then, I don't get out much.

ksquester said...

I am hoping that Whoopie Goldberg replaces Ro.  Let's face it the ratings were never that high when Star (gag) Jones was on there.   Anne

stupidsheetguy said...

I never thought of Whoopie as a possible replacement...that'd be fun, wouldn't it?

However, I think an empty chair would be better than Roseanne Barr.

eilenbug said...

Rosie has been a blast of fresh air to the stale show they call THE VIEW. If they all share the SAME VIEW, what's the point?  lol  Whoopie or Roseann work great for me!  Why are U even watching?

gaboatman said...

Mrs. L
I had rather hoped that Roseanne Barr had gone into permanent retirement for the business.  Another hope dashed!  What are these people thinking of?
Sam

onemoretina said...

Ann Coulter !  Would that be a grand spectacle, or what !  I think I might even watch the show, if that were ever to come to pass.  Just the thought of it makes me shiver with ann-tici-pation .....     Tina

onemoretina said...

Wait .... even better:  They KEEP Rosie, and ADD Ann.  Too perfect.   Tina

salemslot9 said...

I think that soon to be empty seat
has your name on it Mrs. L!
well, we can dream
right?