Wednesday, November 23, 2005

The Clintons' Massage Therapist

AOL isn't listening. What else is new? Now they want to put a disclaimer up on our banners. "The writer of this journal thinks these ads suck." Or something like that. As if that will make us like the ads better. Don't they know you can't put lipstick on this pig?   

Washington DC, where I'm doing the turkey thing, has as many celebrities of the political kind as LA has of the Hollywood kind.

Only in a Costco in DC would I meet the massage therapist to the Clinton White House -- at least he claimed he was -- who managed to tell me right away that he refused to have traditional anesthesia for an operation he needed, opting for an epidural so he would be awake. 

Why am I telling you this? So you can be as flabbergasted as I was. I was just looking for giant jars of Nutella when he chatted me up.  

Ultimately he chose the epidural because, he whispered, he didn't want to reveal any information he had about Monica Lewinsky while he was under a general anesthetic.  I guess the guy talks in his sleep.

I must look like I'm from out of town and would be easily impressed.

Who needs Match.com? Costco on Wednesday before Thanksgiving is the place to meet your soulmate. 

Or somebody very strange.

18 comments:

swibirun said...

I thought it was "Don't wrestle with a pig, you'll both get muddy and the pig likes it."   Seriously, why would AOL want to put lipstick on a pig?  That would be as effective as putting a disclaimer on an.......Ohhhhhhhhhhh


Chris
http://inanethoughtsandinsaneramblings.blogspot.com/
http://www.bigoven.com/~swibirun

meforevermore said...

::stare:: Don't you wish you had a giant "BLOCK" button for people in day to day life? lol

~Lily

screaminremo303 said...

I'll take some Corn-nuts while you're there.

mosie1944 said...

And you didn't tell him what you thought?  That isn't the Ms L I know!

jevanslink said...

He had a look in his eye.  I didn't want to tempt fate.  Mrs. L

mawmellow said...

he didn't mention cigars did he ?

globetrotter2u said...

LMAO! This was hysterical, though I totally believe it. I met the woman who used to do Hillary Clinton's make-up in a ballet class in Sarasota, Florida. She told me that Hillary has such big pockmarks and acne scars on her face that Mark Spitz could have dove right into them! She hated doing her make-up for that reason.
HAve a happy thanksgiving!
MAryanne

robbush6 said...

But did you find the giant jars of Nutella?

ladeeoftheworld said...

I love it.......Clinton's massage therapist.......lol..........

blondepennierae said...

CostcoMatch.com ...  you might have struck on to something with potential.  Pennie

onemoretina said...

Well, I was over at the DQ the other day, and I met the gal who Clinton had ...... uh, nevermind.   Tina     http://journals.aol.com/onemoretina/Ridealongwithme

dcmeyer420 said...

Happy Thanksgiving!

sdoscher458 said...

Happy Thanksgiving and you meet the strangest people....Sandi

mombzbe said...

Happy Thanksgiving, Mrs L.  

You know, in Costco, should you ever need a diversion, just point in the direction opposite, and say "Hey, they're putting out fresh samples of ham over there,"  pray he's not vegetarian, and hold onto that 500 lb cart like there's no tomorrow.
Afterall, you'll have started a stampede.  Nothing makes people nuttier than the free samples at Costco.

The one man left standing after all that: your soul mate. lol
Anna

onmiownnow2 said...

Costco, huh?  LOL!  Happy Thanksgiving!  Lisa

bosoxblue6993w said...

actually ... you CAN put lipstick on a pig.    they remain, however, pigs

ally123130585918 said...

Mrs L...Happy Thanksgiving.....and keep well away from strange men..he sure did sound strange lol..."Didn't want to reveal any information he had about Monica Lewinsky" ..I think we heard all about Monica a long time ago...Doubt there was anything else he could add.....Ally

sunnyside46 said...

are you one of those people who weirdos always find, too? I am a maniac magnet.
Marti