Monday, August 7, 2006

The Upside and the Downside

The upside of the Floyd Landis illegal testosterone story is that the French may have spiked his pee.

The downside is that it makes all those accusations [by the French, of course] about Lance Armstrong's years of doping seem more plausible.

The upside of Mel Gibson's anti-semitic tirade is that he has been asked by a rabbi in Hollywood to speak to the rabbi's congregation at temple during Yom Kippur. Since my Jewish friends often complain about the cost of services on the high holidays -- just to get a seat -- I'm wondering if this rabbi is offering Mr. Gibson a chance for atonement or he's come up with a new way to increase attendance.

The downside of Mel Gibson's anti-semitic tirade is that apparently he thinks he can convince the rest of us that alcohol makes you say things you don't believe. 

The upside of 85-year old John Glenn's recent trip to the hospital with his wife, following a minor car accident, is finding out that he can still drive.

The downside is that he was cited by the cops for turning in front of an oncoming car so that may be a moot point.

The upside of Peter Cook cheating on Christy Brinkley is that 52-year old women across America don't feel so bad now.

The downside is that she might take him back. 

The upside of this latest crisis in the middle east is getting to see what Condi Rice is wearing when she gets off all those planes to Lebanon and Israel. 

The downside is that she doesn't seem to be doing much more than changing outfits. 

The upside about all those commercials for erectile dysfunction is that there's hope for all the impotent old men in the world who long to do that to you one more time.

The downside is being married to them.

The upside of global warming is a longer growing season and reduced heating costs.

The downside is pumping all the melting glacier water out of the basement.

The upside of the secret O.J. tapes is finding out that he has to wait for the bus just like the rest of us.

The downside is that he has the freedom to wait for a bus just like the rest of us.

The upside of this journal is that it keeps me from going to the funny farm.

The downside is that I may already be there.


ksquester said...

Oh Darlin' I've leave the light on for are on a roll today!   Anne

mawmellow said...

The upside is that you recognized the possible need of a funny farm.
The downside is that it took this long !!
LOL .. you always give me food for thought !  

labdancer51 said...

Excellent! :o)

Sandra xxxx

ally123130585918 said...

Brilliant :o) ~ Ally

suzypwr said...

Nicely done, Mrs L.


swibirun said...

The upside about reading this blog is that it made me snicker, giggle, and laugh.

The downside is that I read it while at work.



sistercynthiadr said...

I've long thought that planet Earth might be a cosmic padded room (with some awfully poor padding).  Even if you are already in the funny farm, you've at least got a great attitude, and you made me smile today.

ladeeoftheworld said...

Just a piece of trivia:  some of us females past the half century mark have testosterone levels off the chart.  That's exactly what keeps me away from competive cycling.  Well, that and the fact that riding my geriatric bike once around the block leaves me begging for a huff from Grandma's O2 tank.