Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Do I Have A Stalker Now?

So. Like I said, every guy except one has come back into my life no matter how horrible our break up might have been.

However, this time around, it looks like I've got a problem with someone I haven't seen in ten years. That I haven't wanted to see for ten years. Who apparently can't take a hint that I don't want to see him for ten million years. Read the back story HERE.

I sent a one word reply after receiving this guy's out-of-the-blue email followed by a snail mail delivery. The one word was "RECEIVED." To let him know -- per his request -- that I got his communications. It was also to prevent him from coming to my house with the excuse that he hadn't heard from me. 

If anything says "You must have me confused with someone who gives a shit," it would be that one word response to his entreaties for forgiveness. A sign that I never wanted to see him again.

But no. He took my one word response as an opportunity to email me AGAIN. 

Yep. Today he stepped over the line. 

Only someone with serious boundary issues could mistake my message for anything other than GO AWAY. 

Sadly, what I was afraid might happen has happened. That one word was enough encouragement for him to send today's email [my comments added]: 



I am without doubt dead to you. YOU GOT THAT RIGHT!

I earned that with immature, impetuous, completely regrettable behavior. ACTUALLY, I FOUND YOUR BEHAVIOR BACK THEN TO BE BIZARRELY INAPPROPRIATE AND DISTURBED --  REVEALING A CHARACTER FLAW, OR PERSONALITY DISORDER. IMMATURITY IS FOR YOUNG PEOPLE. YOU WERE DEEP INTO YOUR FORTIES. AFTER 20 YEARS OF PUTTING UP WITH YOUR CRAPOLA, I WAS DONE. 

While resurrection might be too much to ask for, in case it might matter, I hope to report that there’s been some adult-onset maturity in the past five or so years. Maybe even more than just some. SORRY. SENDING THIS LATEST EMAIL SAYS OTHERWISE. PLUS, I JUST DON'T GIVE A SHIT.

While it might not seem that there’s anything in it for you, and it might be easy to simply continue (as it were) as we’ve done, I would like to ask you to please consider the possibility of accepting the heartfelt apology of a grateful, loyal, chastened friend, who is completely more painfully aware of the magnitude of the loss of your friendship. (And a friend who’d be more actively protective of that friendship should it chance to be restored.) YOU'RE RIGHT. THERE IS NOTHING IN THIS FOR ME. SO. GO. AWAY.

I sincerely hope that this will be enough to merit even the smallest step forward. I know that if it's even possible, I will have to earn your trust back, a step at a time. NOT HAPPENING. I AM NOT THAT STUPID.

Do you think you could find it in your heart to meet for coffee or other beverage and let me apologize again and beg for forgiveness in person? NO. NO. NO. NO. DID I MENTION I AM NOT THAT STUPID? ESPECIALLY SINCE I CAN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME YOU PAID FOR ANYTHING. 


This time I won't respond to his email. Except for what I've written here on the blog. 
UPDATE: No, not another email. Just the passage of time. I have had a chance to think about how this mess could have gone so much better. First, the whole apology thing.  WTF? Nevermind that ten years is way too long to wait. [On the other hand, if a felony had been involved, there's no statute of limitations.] But, his obsequious attempt to apologize after a decade was cringe-worthy at best. And begging for forgiveness just upped the EEEEWWWWW factor. 

Because I am nothing if not a helpful [former] friend, here's what he should have said -- "Dear Mrs. Linklater" [and that's what he should have called me, by the way], "As I recall, our last conversation didn't end well. If only I'd realized the error of my ways sooner and just offered to go fuck myself, our friendship might have survived that unfortunate event. Too bad I can't un-ring that bell. However, on the chance that anything is possible, here's my phone number in case you ever need a friend. Again."

At least I would have thought about calling. Unfortunately, there's two chances of that happening now -- slim and none. 







4 comments:

Jon said...

I have a good nose for rodents and I smell a major rat. I'm certain this dude is about as trustworthy as a glass of Tijuana tap water. There seems to be a toxic urgency in his persistence.

(you already knew this, but I couldn't resist putting in my two cents)

Mrs. L said...

Thanks for your two cents. Always welcome!

Chris said...

Well, damn. I thought I was signing in to read something funny but that is some scary behavior. "received" was more clear and ice cold than "f*** you and your mother's grave". If that didn't come through, then, wow.

Social cues. Learn them. Use them.

Mrs. L said...

Egg-actly, Chris. Nicely put.