Tuesday, September 21, 2004

HEEEELLLLLPPPPP!!!

If you go to Keyword GRAPEVINE, you'll find my picture and under it is a very racy quote about sexual innuendos that was taken completely out of context by AOL.  Funny how they hold us to one standard and practice another.

The quote was from an answer to one of Patrick's Saturday Six.  "How would you rate your journal?"  And I said, "R" for swear words, although I wasn't adverse to sexual innuendos, if I could remember one.  That was supposed to be an old people joke, not a come on.

Apparently they thought they were doing me a favor using the quote the way they did. Like I was trolling for dates or something. 

I thought when the editor wanted my picture, the plan was to link to an entry in my journal. 

Instead they pretty much made me the poster girl for one night stands. They might as well have said, "Hey all you pervs and lonely guys, here's a chick who likes to do it in the road -- be sure to contact her."

You know what this means, don't you.  I've been IM'd by all kinds of guys who usually start out, "Hi, Sexy."   * gag *

And where do they get off calling me HUN and LOVE?  WTF?

A married guy went to the FOR GIRLS ONLY entry in my journal and read my list of 100 attributes for my latest ideal man. He then told me he had none of those attributes and offered his services. He also said he used Viagra.  0-70 with no brakes.   

What are they thinking? That the internet gives you carte blanche to skip from Hello to Honey, let's hump in the next sentence?

My personal favorite was Jffsing, I think, whose hometown pic was of him from the waist down in his black Speedo.  Looked like there was a muffler in his pants.

Charmed, I sure.

Here comes another IM.

 

UPDATE:  September 24th.  Finally asked AOL to take my profile [picture, quote, link to this journal, etc] down.   Let somebody else deal with those guys. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

6 comments:

somenuttychic said...

Mrs. L., you hot sex kitten, you! Welcome to the world of online pickups of the non-4-wheel variety. Sorry to hear about your debacle, but based on my experience, what you've dealt with so far is par for the course.

sistercdr said...

Excuse me for laughing, but it is in sympathy.  I didn't make the grapevine page, but I got hit with ims all week when my journal got featured once.  A sense of humor is absolutely essential for survival.

slowmotionlife said...

Oops... you've been burned by the Gods at AOL.  Sorry, girl.  Join the club.  It seems once you give them permission, they have free reign to use you however they see fit. That's why I usually turn down their offers for features.  They once pit me in some kind of contest against some other journals, several of which I really admire and respect and had no interest in being compared to - whether good or bad.  This was completely without my permission or knowledge.  Someone else told me about it. Grrr...

But I kinda have to laugh about the unwanted sexual attention.  Mainly because I've been there and it's no fun - I don't envy you.  During one feature, I got 20 or 30 emails a day! [I don't keep myself open on IM]  Most of them were pretty generic, guys who didn't even bother to read my journal and find out I'm MARRIED. LOL  But some guys were just over the top, wanting to suck my toes and crazy stuff like that.  LOL  Trust that it slows down after the feature is removed.  And if you're really upset about the quote, write the editor that first contacted you.  Complain.  That's what I'd do.  I really wish they'd get our approval BEFORE they post anything - we're giving them free information for their content pages. The least they could do is give us the chance to protest if we find something inappropriate.

judithheartsong said...

eewwwwwww! You poor thing. That is revolting. I and the other lesbians here have commented on the fact that some guys IM us just because we are lesbians. I still wonder what part of LESBIAN they don't understand.......... shame on aol, unless a cutie turns up... and then they should have to pay for a really nice dinner!!!!!

ann7inflorida said...

This entire entry is hilarious! Hey Sexy. ; )

murkysapphire said...

About skipping from Hello to Honey, let's hump...you said it, sister!  The internet seems to be a haven for all the creeps and losers who don't have the guts (or the skills) to try these come-ons in the actual world for fear of getting decked.

A lot of local guys use the AOL profiles as their personal cybersex dating service, and I was once approached by a very cocky jackass who asked what kind of panties I wear.  Though I declined to answer, the questions got more lude until I told him off!  I swear to God I saw him a few weeks later at a local restaurant (he'd sent me a picture before things turned rude), and the only thing that stopped me from slapping his face was the minute possibility of mistaken identity.